The Corporate Woman

Setting aside time to reflect gives you the opportunity to see how things fit together and identify gaps.  This nothing new, right?  You know this, have experienced it, whether it was in your personal life or work life or both.  So if we know it, have felt the benefit of it, why is it so hard to do?  Why do we feel compelled to fill up every precious waking minute with a task?  How many of you feel the impulse in an idle moment to pick up your Blackberry or iPhone (or similar item)?  Do you ask yourself why?  I do.

I’m a big fan of reflection and thinking time.  I am also an unrepentant and inveterate multitasker (yes, I’m doing it now – picture me listening to music, checking email, Twitter, blogging and researching chi square testing).  I find that I have to remind myself of how much I can get done by taking the time to step back from it all and reflect.  Even given that, some of my best insights and ideas have come from when I am doing some mindless task instead of doing nothing at all but thinking.  Knowing that, I seek out that form of reflection and integrate it into the flow of my life.  Don’t think I’m all successful at it though – it’s an ongoing practice.  And although it doesn’t come naturally, I do the quiet, non-task version of reflection too… just not as often.

I can tell you that I have learned that if I don’t have this time on a regular basis, I’m less happy, less productive, less creative, less insightful – more restless, more stressed and more easily distracted.  There’s an inner warning bell that goes off when I start to feel like this.  I know it’s time to step back.

How have you found the power of reflection working for you?  Do you make time for it?  How does your life feel when you don’t make time for it?  Share your stories with me because I’m really interested in learning how it works for others.

Tags: insight, Reflection, thoughful

My daughter is six years old and very imaginative.  Her creativity fascinates me.  This week, she lost her second tooth – let me tell that it has seemed both a dramatic and funny saga that I simply had to share.  Maybe it will make you laugh too (-:

It starts like this… On a dark and stormy night – oh wait, wrong story.   <rummage, rummage, rummage> Ah, here it is… About a week ago, her second tooth (bottom, center, right) reached a point where it was hanging by minuscule means.  So we began the nightly practice of me asking for one chance to gently tug on the tooth to remove it and her having dramatic hysterics for at least ten minutes before reluctantly letting me try.   Each night, no success (I am fortunate if I can even get a hold of the tooth, much less actually tug).

On Monday night, I finally get to reach in there and it pops right out.  But she is still wailing and begging me not to pull it out.  I start laughing so hard that I can’t even show her the tooth is already out.  She gets more upset that I am laughing.  Finally, I manage some semblance of control and show her the tooth and like magic, all tears and various other symptoms of histrionics disappear.  She is now all smiles.

But suddenly, a new concern rears its ugly head – tomorrow is her playdate with her best friend Esther and she has to show her this tooth.  So nothing will do but we must find a hiding place for the tooth, so the tooth fairy will not take it.  And, to be totally certain there is no misunderstanding, we must leave her a note, in case she ransacks the house looking for the tooth in hiding and takes it.  You can imagine our thoughts at this point, right?

The tooth is fortunately still there to be shown to her best friend and is dutifully placed on the nightstand for pick up by the tooth fairy.  This morning in the car, my little girl starts telling me that the tooth fairy can walk through walls (must be a great skill to have, better than the chimney gig).  She also states, quite firmly, that the tooth fairy gives a kiss for every coin you receive.  Two gold coin dollars translates to two kisses.  Okay, I am with her there although I don’t recall kissing her at that point.  I recall desperately trying to sneak out her room as quiet as I could, despite the various toy obstacles leftover from the previously mentioned playdate.  Then she declares that the first kiss is felt but the second one cannot be felt.  Perhaps because the tooth fairy is already dematerializing in preparation for heading out through the wall, on to her next appointment.

So I walked into work this morning with a big smile on my face, because I had such a great start to my day.  A story moment to treasure and share.  My day is good!

Tags: daughter, Family, love, memories, treatsure

I admit to fear and to worry and to doubt.  I am fortunate in these times of fear and uncertainty, where many are suffering the most dramatic and awful change of their lives.  I am thankful, every day, for what I have:  my good health (and health insurance), my loved ones (and their good health), my great job (that I am lucky to love) and the basics we all need (food, shelter, etc…).  My heart goes out to those who are suffering because I remember earlier days where a roof over my head was uncertain, not much food (so thankful for free school lunch programs) and no health insurance (or money for much needed medicines, like my asthma inhaler).  I remember and my heart cries out for them.

What I wonder about is the thread of small, angry voices I hear on the web.  Why?  Is it fear that causes some to rant and say others deserve such awful reversals of fortune?  Is it spite or small mindedness?  Self-righteousness and smug insensitivity?  I guess I just don’t get it.  Yes, some are in their current situations due to unwise choices.  I don’t know about you but I’ve made more than a few “unwise choices” in my life and had to live with those consequences.  This doesn’t mean that I don’t feel for them though.  It doesn’t mean that I take pleasure or feel smug about their situation.  I know I am not alone in this because I read and hear those voices too – the wondering ones who feel empathy and are thankful for what they have.

Each day, I will live in joy (for my good fortune) and fear (that it might somehow go awry) and empathy (for those who have lost so much).  I suspect, this is how my year will go.  How about you?

Tags: Change, Endurance, Fear, Spirit

I had the opportunity to speak to the local Toastmaster’s group and guests yesterday on the topic of public speaking.  I shared with them my journey from terror and lots of mistakes to finally learning how to be comfortable and myself in front of an audience.  I was happy to share my pain and suffering in the hopes that someone could learn from what I have learned.  The most fun was hearing the questions people asked!

It was also thought provoking to look back and remember how much speaking used to terrify me.  Did it used to scare you?  Or does it still?  Why is this such a scary thing?  At the time, it seemed so clear to me why my knees were knocking, my breath was short and I couldn’t remember a darn thing I planned to say.  But I can’t seem to pin down the why.  It just was.  I am so thankful now that these experiences are actually fun and interesting.  I am fortunate that I was able to learn from all those mistakes and overcome my fear.  Now I get to share what I learned!

Tags: Public Speaking

The business planning cycle I have gotten used to seems to be one of good intentions but just slightly off.  I have had the good fortune to see this planning cycle work the same at more than one company.  I ask myself this (and you, of course) – is this cycle a necessity or can it be successfully improved upon?  Here’s the one I mean – it starts with budget time (where you hope you have a solid long range strategy to lean on).  It’s approximately mid-summer.  Now, for some it actually starts a bit sooner or a bit later but I picked a mean.  You haven’t solidified your plan for the next year yet but you have the framework, so you can put together the money.  Then year end hits (for those of you on the calendar fiscal year, which is quite a lot of you) and everyone is focused on that.  Come January, you hope to have a finalized budget and plan for the year.  That is always the goal.  It’s part of why you start the budget cycle early, right?  But how many of you make it to the goal line of early January?  Part of that is because you need to see how year end close went but there are often other factors that get in the way.  So you may not have a final plan and budget until February or even March.  It’s a crazy cycle – shampoo, rinse, repeat!  Every year this happens, everywhere I work or where my friends and colleagues work, it tends to happen.  Does it work better where you are?

Tags: Balance, Change, Leadership, Work

Earlier this year, I talked about it being time for change – how do you decide?  How do you know it’s time?  Well, my family and I decided it was time when an opportunity to go work for Citrix Online came open in my field.  What a great company, really smart and talented people and a great desire for being ever more customer focused.  My family loves living in beautiful Santa Barbara vs. living north of Seattle in Bothell.  Change like this often feels like a leap of faith - you weigh your options, check your gut, agonize with friends and family (okay, maybe that last one is only me) and then decide.  You really don’t know until you actually make the choice though, do you?

Well, this choice lets me know that 20/20 hindsight is calling this a great choice.   More to come on the questions of customer loyalty and driving improvements in customer experience in the next blog.

Take care and stay tuned!

Tags: Authenticity, Change, Family, Self-Clarity

My mother passed away on Friday.  I feel sad but also happy and at peace.  You see, she has been terribly ill for a very long time and we who loved her have watched her decline in an anxious miasma of sadness and helplessness.  The thought that continues to reverberate through my brain is that she isn’t hurting anymore.  For the first time in a very long time, her life is not defined by pain. 

It has made me think a great deal about the nature of pain (great and small) and what we choose to endure.  My mother often talked about her reasons for fighting to stay in this life, despite the pain.  She was quite clear on that.  And I wonder, what does it take to have that clarity regarding other choices in our lives?  What helps us to decide that this is an acceptable situation and that is not? 

I am proud of my mother for the fight she put up and for her strength to stop fighting when she chose her time.  I miss her.  She will always be a part of me and I am glad to carry those lessons in my heart and my life.  I am happy that she knew, always, not just at the end, how much she means to me and how much I love her.  How fortunate I am.  That’s a thought to remember and makes the pain of her loss somehow less. 

 For those of you have expressed your condolences, thank you.

Tags: Authenticity, Change, Family, Self-Clarity

This time of year often brings the introspective urge to the forefront.  I really love this time of year, the time I get to spend with my family and the fun I get in putting up the tree.  The thoughfulness though… that makes me look back on the year and myself.  What could I have done better or differently?  Did I do what I wanted to do with my life and career this year?  What should I do differently? 

So far, I’ve decided that I am ready for a new challenge.  I’ve really enjoyed the challenges of the past two years and have accomplished a lot of what I set out to do but now, now there is something missing, something more that I want to do.  Now, the fun part is deciding what that might be!

How many of you are thinking the same thing?

-T

Tags: Balance, Self-Clarity